LOVE or LUST, what is it going to be?

I would love to ask this one question before I continue ranting….Have you ever truly LOVED? And I don’t mean loving ur mum, dad, siblings, family, friends, colleagues, church member, neighbors and your Followers on Twitter. :D, I mean loving one special somebody, an opposite sex from different background, different works of life, different orientation, the kind of love that makes you feel complete….HAVE YOU? And if u have, what happened? Why would such love end.? Was the love true? Does TRUE love exist? If it was true, wasn’t it worth fighting for? :/……. I know most of you will frankly say there’s no LOVE but I strongly believe Love exists. Basically, Our existence is based on LOVE. If my parents can still not go a day without talking to each other on phone 3 to 4times daily even when dad is out of town, if dad can tell mum every move and plans he’s making and they both see the possibilities in their next step or plans together, if dad can still take mum to his meetings, hang outs, dinners, event, on dates holding her hands, if mum gets a funny feeling when dad’s head aches and vice versa,……after 28years of being married? then LOVE exists. ❤ Love is an emotion of a strong AFFECTION and PERSONAL ATTACHMENT. Love is also said to be a VIRTUE representing all of human KINDNESS, COMPASSION, and AFFECTION —”THE UNSELFISH LOYAL AND BENEVOLENT CONCERN FOR THE GOOD OF ANOTHER”. (Please note the words in caps) And LUST?
Lust is an emotion or feeling of intense desire in the body. The lust can take any form such as the lust for knowledge, the lust for SEX or the lust for power. It can take such mundane forms as the lust for food as distinct from the need for food. Lust is a powerful psychological force producing INTENSE wanting for an object, or circumstance fulfilling the INTENSE wanting for an object, or circumstance fulfilling the emotion.
I know at this point you are wondering what ELSIE is trying to say……please calm down ;).
I remember having a discussion with my cousin some weeks back, and these were my words to her “Are all these so called relationships and breakups LOVE or LUST?” She smiled and said “babes abeg plus love oh and lust oh non exist, we are all doing “TRY YOUR LUCK”” I so couldn’t help the laughter. But sincerely, do u think she’s right? ……you have to answer this one jor.
And a close friend of mine will say and I quote “This is no love matter jor, its GIVE and TAKE, once he treats you right, pays your bills, then give him all the attention and treat him right” ……Do you think she’s right too?…….. Question for you too! 😀 Back to my ranting, Ama just ignore the other words in Caps and pick on these words -» “THE UNSELFISH LOYAL AND BENOVELENT CONCERN FOR THE GOOD OF ANOTHER”…..for you to have read to this point, am sure you understand this statement…… Unselfish loyal……concern…..good of ANOTHER (partner)…you that just said YES to the question of you being in love, have you truly followed this words? And we that are not in love, when it happens are we willing to give the Unconditional love?
I somewhat believe Love is all about UNDERSTANDING and for there to be understanding, there has to be COMMUNICATION at the same time, there must be TRUST, which can only be earned or built depends on how you see it.
Now moving to our gender separate issues….the guys will say “I may flirt but I know who I want “….. “the fact that am having sex with other girls doesn’t mean I don’t love my girlfriend”….. “I can always move to the next one, there r many fishes in the river”….. “soldier go soldier come barracks remain the same”……. “am a MAN, she’s the woman, the woman integrity is important but the men? Naaaa”…….. “I have the right to sleep with her friends ( or acquaintances as the case ( or acquaintances as the case maybe) if they make advances at me, but she has no right to indulge with my male friends” ……the list goes on. I wonder if they ever realized that love and being possessive goes hand in hand.
And the ladies will say ……. “Don’t lay your eggs into one basket”…..some ladies even have different boyfriends for different matters….the boyfriend that takes care of her hair, another for home appliance, another for provisions, another for good sex, another for changing their wardrobe…..the list continues and then they have this one innocent man that they hope he ends up marrying them, the non social guy whom they claim to love, that ll not bump into them and their alhaji’s , politicians,….just call them Sugar daddy or MAGA! And there’s the executive Ho’s that call themselves the BOSSLADIES and have successfully been able to blind most men into loving them as MISS INDEPENDENT concern….but we know how it all happened……Even as much as men rant about the natural beauty and all….they ll always choose the Brazilian hair, artificial eyelash, bleached lady over a natural beauty, that’s how annoying MEN are….their brain wants something else but their eyes lust for another……did I just say that? *whew* ok…Elsie Calm down, you are vexing……I am calm.
But really if what most men feel for we ladies aren’t LUST then why have fixing our differences been so difficult? Why does their attitude change after sex? Even if it doesn’t, why do you get tired of same lady you professed so much love to after a while? Why have we forgotten the fact that “no one is perfect”? Why do we neglect compromise? Why do you just say the sweet words just to go back and tell your friend…I finally had her? Why do we jump around different men, what exactly are you looking for?
But I still believe the ladies are on the receiving end, you meet this guy, and we ladies can “mumuishly” fall ehn, u just start liking the guy, feel on top of the world “I have a boyfriend” “I love him” and suddenly he turns off the music he has been playing and the tears starts rolling…. I don’t want to start boring you but since love is meant to be you watching out for your partner (as a default button) then we should all sit back and think.
“DO TO OTHERS WHAT YOU WANT TO BE DONE TO YOU”. Treat your partner the very way you expect her to treat you. Its not a one sided thing, its a 2way traffic. Guys, if your mission is just to set that P, back off now, its 2013! And ladies, if you don’t like him and definitely won’t allow love grow or think of spending the rest of your life with him….LET HIM GO politely…don’t hang in there cause of the money., don’t lead him ON! Its 2013. We can all have a better love life! It begins with you. Enough of the heartBreaks. Guys please sincerity goes a long way. And ladies, pretending is stupid…raise your standard to being YOU.
As usual @Elsieisy will be waiting for the actions and reactions. I love you all. Have a blessed 2013!
NOTE : Guys!!! This is Africa, NIGERIA to b precise! your job is to take care of your woman and that won’t change. Stop being an ass. Grow up! Be a MAN!

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11 thoughts on “LOVE or LUST, what is it going to be?

  1. Hehehehe….a friend and I were talking about this topic some days ago.she asked me to define love and u dnt wanna know what I said.lol.a lot of ppl have different definitions of d word ‘love’.u dnt even wanna know half of them.all I pray for is someone hu’d have d same views with me on what love is……. Nice post dearie.u write on functional issues (Y)

  2. Yo Els ur msg is on point…
    Love does exist
    sme ppl just cnt find it so dey mke their own theories bout lust n love being non existent

  3. Ermmm…. Jus don’t tynk stuff like dat exist… Tynk we jus playing around deciving our selfs-
    All u jus av to do is play ur game on.. Wen its tym to get married den u marry-
    Buh 4 love 4 it- tanks

  4. Did I mention that I’m in love with u for this Write up? Yes babes,I love u for this! It’s like u just read my mind nd put everything together on here. God bless u! (Y)

  5. It’s really a touching one, I greatly do believe in love, and i think in very lust their is a bit of love or likeness, well let me not bore with my comment but it is really a great and lovely post kudos!! to you Ada.

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